What is one piece of advice you wish you could offer your former expectant self?

Please remember and know that you can forgive yourself for not always being perfect at everything – you can’t be and that is OK! Also, try not to compare yourself and your family to others – what you do works for you and what others do may not… you know what is best for you and your family, and that’s all that really matters.

FOR MOMS: If you breastfed, was there a place for you to pump that met your needs and was conducive to your success? If you breastfed, how did you decide to continue? FOR DADS: What, if any, adjustments did you (or your workplace) make to your schedule after having a baby? Was it specific to your manager or larger, whole work culture?

I chose to breastfeed exclusively as long as I was able to do so, which I was fortunate enough to figure out. I wanted her to get all of the nutrients she needed and that she could get through breast milk, as long as that was an option (and if it would not have worked out and she would have needed formula, that would have been OK too). I also loved all the snuggle time and bonding that I got by doing this … 🙂

I did pump for the first six months or so. I pumped twice a day, but when she started to reject bottles, it became unnecessary, as I was already having to throw out milk, which KILLED me! But when she would take the bottles, it was so helpful, so I didn’t mind the pumping.

How much leave did you take, and how comfortable were you taking it?

I did not take an official leave of any kind. As I mentioned, I work from home and run my own business, so while I did take a little time, I was checking emails almost instantly, even while recovering from my c-section and figuring out my new life. Fortunately, I work with some amazing people and my clients were very understanding when I had my daughter, so I didn’t feel a tremendous amount of pressure to do too much right away … that definitely helped!

How easy was it to put a childcare arrangement together and did it work for your family?

I actually don’t have a childcare arrangement – it’s mainly me, and my family that helps when they are in town. It is VERY difficult and all goes back to that balancing act I talked about earlier…

What was your biggest challenge going back to work?

I think the biggest challenge is the balance. I work from home, so I am fortunate enough to have a flexible work schedule, but I also have to make sure I get everything done that I need to, all while trying not to miss out on things with my daughter … that is the biggest challenge!

Who was your biggest source of support in returning to work? What was your biggest pregnancy indulgence?

I have friends who have similar situations, so I definitely looked to them for some advice and watched how they did things, but for the most part, I’ve been figuring it out as I go along. Some days I have it totally handled and easily get everything done, and some I just don’t … I’ve just come to realize and recognize that it is OK to not always get everything done.

Fill in the blanks: As a working parent, I never expected ____ would be so hard and ____ would be so much easier!

As soon as you figure something out, it changes … don’t get too stuck on the little things because little people are ever-changing and growing, and the good – and tough – times will too.

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