It's working for Stephanie J
Gainesville, Florida
1 child
"[I wish I had known] that spending so many years in school to help others would eventually hurt my family (I cannot stay at home with my baby for a year without defaulting on my student loans)."
What is one piece of advice you wish you could offer your former expectant self?
Plan/budget for one parent to stay at home for at least a year to minimize pressure to make critical decisions for your family during such a special (and exhausting) time of your lives.
What was your primary motivation for deciding to return (or not) to work? How early did you tell your employer?
My employer at the time of conception made it clear that I would have no paid maternity leave (aside from accrued vacation/sick leave) and that leave would only be granted in accordance with FMLA guidelines, so my husband and I decided that it was a good time for me to pursue my dreams and return to school to specialize, because school would start approximately 6 months after my due date, and specializing would give me more part-time options.
FOR MOMS: If you breastfed, was there a place for you to pump that met your needs and was conducive to your success? If you breastfed, how did you decide to continue? FOR DADS: What, if any, adjustments did you (or your workplace) make to your schedule after having a baby? Was it specific to your manager or larger, whole work culture?
I chose breastfeeding due to scientific evidence and physical ability. I would have been very disappointed if I could not breastfeed, and refused to give it up for work.
How much leave did you take, and how comfortable were you taking it?
12 weeks was provided, but since I quit my job, I had 6 months. I dreaded leaving my son and putting him in daycare to the point of mild depression (crying daily).
What was your biggest challenge going back to work?
In short, and in order of relevance
1) I did not get support for breast-feeding/pumping at work (baby would not eat adequately when separated from me and I was discouraged from pumping)
2) 6 months was too soon for mama and baby (sleep deprivation)
3) Employer/director was inconsiderate of personal lives (schedule changed on short notice, breaks were not given)
4) My husband was deployed
After four weeks I left the program and am working (prn) on weekends until I can find a job that is flexible.
Fill in the blanks: As a working parent, I never expected ____ would be so hard and ____ would be so much easier!
That spending so many years in school to help others would eventually hurt my family (I cannot stay at home with my baby for a year without defaulting on my student loans).